Steady

A free fortnightly call for men

Online, an hour every second Tuesday, guided. Free, with nothing to prepare and no pressure to speak. Come as you are.

First call: Tuesday 13 October 2026, 7:00 to 8:00pm Melbourne time.

Register for 13 October
Steady, a fortnightly call for men

Why a standing call

Most men I work with don't need another program straight away. What helps first is somewhere regular to land. A call that's in the diary every fortnight, whether the week went well or sideways, does something a one-off workshop can't.

Some of the men this is for are rebuilding after a controlling relationship. Others aren't in crisis at all. They've noticed life has gone a bit grey, or they're carrying more than they say out loud. Both are welcome, and neither has to explain himself to the other.

The shape of an hour

We start with a short practice to arrive, usually something with the breath or the senses. The middle of the call opens up from there. Some weeks I'll teach one idea about how the nervous system works and we'll try it together on the spot. Other weeks a question from the group sets the direction instead.

We close the same way every time, with a few minutes of settling before you go back to your evening. What the hour does for you is yours to find out. Some men will leave calmer, some just quieter, and either is fine.

Everything on the call is an invitation. You can sit out any practice and simply listen, and you never need to explain why.

A note on what this is. Steady is a skills and practice call, not group therapy. I'm there to guide, and nobody is asked to share their story. If something tender surfaces during a call, message me privately in the chat and we'll look after it. And if what's going on needs more than an hour a fortnight can hold, I'll help you find the right support.

What it's built to give you

  • Practices short enough to survive a real weeknight
  • A working feel for what regulation is, in your own body rather than on paper
  • A rhythm that's always in the diary, whether or not the fortnight went to plan
  • Somewhere to ask the questions you wouldn't post anywhere

When we meet

Every second week. The off weeks belong to your life.

Every second Tuesday, 7:00 to 8:00pm Melbourne time, online. It's a video call, so you're welcome from anywhere the time works. Pick a date, register, and the video link comes with your confirmation.

Miss a call and nothing breaks. The point of a fortnightly rhythm is that another one is always close.

A bit about me

Rudi Doku, who hosts Steady.
Rudi, your host.

I'm Rudi. I work as a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, I'm trained in Internal Family Systems, and I'm completing a master's in counselling and psychotherapy. I've also been on the receiving end of the kind of relationship this work exists for, and that story is here. Through Reclaim I run structured recovery work for men coming out of coercive control. Steady exists for the men around that work, and well beyond it, who want the steadiness without needing a full program.

There's more on my background over here if you're curious.

Things men usually ask first

What's the catch? Why is it free?

There isn't one. Steady is free and stays free. I make my living from one-to-one work, and I don't pitch it on the call. If you ever want more than the fortnightly hour, there's a discovery call you can book any time, and asking will always come from you, not me.

Do I have to talk?

You don't. Cameras can stay off and you can sit with the whole call quietly. You'd be welcome to do exactly that for your first few.

Is it recorded?

I don't record the call, ever. And everyone who joins agrees to the same thing at the start: no recordings or screenshots, and nothing identifying repeated outside the call. It's a small room, I say it plainly every time, and anyone who won't hold that line doesn't stay.

Will anyone know I'm there?

Your registration is between you and me. First names are fine on the call, cameras are optional, and nobody is asked where they're from or what brought them. The recording question above covers how the room itself is held.

Is this only for men who've been through coercive control?

No. That's part of my work, and some men on the call will be in that recovery, but the call itself is for any man who wants a steadier baseline. Nobody gets asked about his history.

What if I get emotional during a practice?

That's normal with body-based work and nothing you need to manage or hide. You can stop and just listen, or step away from the screen for a bit. If you'd rather flag it quietly, message me in the chat. Nothing on the call is compulsory.

What if things are really bad right now?

Steady is a steadying rhythm, not crisis support, and a fortnightly call is the wrong tool for a bad tonight. The Support page lists services that answer around the clock, and you're welcome at the next call regardless.

I've never done anything somatic before. Will I be lost?

You won't. Everything is guided from scratch each time, and there's no jargon you need to arrive with.

What do I need to join?

A phone or computer and somewhere reasonably private for the hour. The video link arrives with your registration confirmation. Nothing to download in advance, nothing to prepare, and headphones help if the house is full.

Can I join late, or leave early?

Yes to both. The door isn't locked at 7:03, and if you need to go at quarter to, go. An hour you half-attend beats a fortnight you skip because the whole hour wasn't possible.